Brian Crossman is a partner in Estevan-based Independent Well Servicing. The opinions expressed in this column are the opinions of the author and not necessarily the opinions of Independent Well Servicing.
Brian Crossman. Photo by Brian Zinchuk
I love flying. Let’s face it, if you want/need to go a long distance in the shortest time possible, a smooth airplane ride will do nicely. The seats are somewhat comfortable, and flight crews are usually friendly. You can sleep a bit, watch television, or listen to an audiobook you’ve downloaded on your smart phone. Hell, if you want to surf the net, most modern planes have Wi-Fi. Wwwwwhhhhhaaaattttttt? Mind-blowing technology to be sure. When I started flying way back in the Stone Age, you got to read the travel magazine in the seat pocket located conveniently next to the safety instruction card. Ugh, why didn’t I bring a book?
Anyway, flying is pretty great. Admittedly, flying in coach sucks, but you still get to your destination in good time. (Note: we flew business class once. I don’t have the editorial license to gush about it for the next thirty paragraphs…… But DAMN, the seats and the hot towels alone are worth it)
modern airplane travel, clear blue sky in background
But flying isn’t as much fun anymore. Especially if you’re from Saskatchewan. A couple of years ago travelling at Christmas was a nightmare for travelers. Some friends were trying to get to Mexico for holidays; they ended up driving to Las Vegas and flew from there. No joke. Not that many years ago, flying was stupidly easy. Show up at the airport, wander on in, get on the plane, listen to the flight attendant tell you what to do, and “Whoosh!” off you went. They served you some food; you could have a couple of brewskis, take a nap. These days, many flights leave Regina, then go to Winnipeg (No offense to my family and friends from there but really, “Winterpeg??”) first, then fly back over Saskatchewan to get to Calgary. Have the airlines lost their collective “give-a shit?” It boggles the mind. And don’t get me started on all the security protocols since 911, I understand why, but it’s damn irritating.
I travel to Calgary on a regular basis for work. In the energy industry, it’s a requirement. But I have not flown to Calgary for a long time. I quit flying to the “Oil Capital” years ago. Why? Glad you asked. Here is the best way for me to explain it.
A few years back I was in Calgary having lunch with a client. He asked me how my flight was, and I told him, “No I drove up.” “In fact, I’d been driving up for years.” He looked at me like I was some sort of Jackwagon. I said, “Allow me to explain.”
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The trip from my garage to my hotel in downtown Calgary is a nine hour drive. Maybe it will be a bit longer if I stop for lunch or coffee with friends. Here is how I justify it. If I fly:
I drive from Estevan to YQR; Two hours plus, if the weather and road construction cooperates.
Park my truck and then carry my gear into the airport, get checked in, check a bag, wait to Board; One hour thirty minutes. Probably two hours. I always arrive early; I have recurring nightmares of being late and missing a flight.
Fly from YQR to YYC on a Dash Eight. That is around one hour and thirty minutes. (I’m already at least five hours travelling.)
Arrive at YYC, hopefully it’s not too busy (Bwhahahahaha) I disembark; get my luggage, which is ALWAYS the last bag off the carousel. Then go outside, wait for the shuttle, go downtown in heavy traffic.
Two hours guaranteed.
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The usual time I have spent travelling to Calgary by air is seven hours or so. However, you could say, “Sure Crossman, but you are still two hours to the good, right?”
That is an accurate statement. But, just like the commercial for “Slap Chop”, I will stop you here and say, “Wait, there’s more!” The thing is, once I’m in Calgary, I really like having my truck. The vehicle gives me a lot of freedom while I’m in town. I can drive to the south end of town and meet my buddies Les & Robin for supper. If Val comes with me on my trip, I can take her out for supper and shopping. I have family in Red Deer, I can visit as well if time permits.
Anyway, a few months later my client was on his regular trip to southeast Sask, and we met up for lunch. I noticed the truck he drove was not a rental. He said, “I took your advice!” “I drove out this trip, and it was fantastic!” “No airport bullshit, made some calls (hands-free of course) while I drove out, had lunch in Swift Current with a buddy, all good.”
I have to admit, I don’t mind the drive to Calgary at all either. I have a lot of time to think and plan my week; make some calls (again, hands-free) and stop in Brooks to say hi to good friends. And if you are one of those guys that always say, “If your dog runs away in Saskatchewan, you can see him still running the next day.” Absolutely not true. You have to stand on your tailgate. But I do love the prairie views and the living skies. (Which by the way, extend well into Alberta)
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This past August I was all booked to fly to Calgary for a “quick trip.” Cue a hailstorm of biblical proportions at YYC and my flight is cancelled and re-scheduled. (Trying to deal with West Jet at three in the morning was a challenge and only served to solidify my stance on this subject) This throws a wrench in the works, so I cancelled and drove up the next week. It was a great trip, and I listened to some good audio books stopped for coffee with some oil patch buddies.
If you still choose to fly, here is some free advice.
-Don’t ever watch Mayday on Discovery channel; re-enactments of plane crashes do not inspire confidence in air travel.
-Pack light, as in carry-on only. You’ll thank me when your luggage ends up on the other side of the country and the airline answering machine is no help whatsoever.
-If there are small children on the flight, and they are kicking your seat from the back, think of your own kids or in my case grandchildren. If you don’t have little ones, remember, they are the future, so be patient.
-Try to think about the proven statistics that say you are more likely to die in a car accident than a plane crash, which might make you feel a little better, maybe even smug.
Now, to all my friends and colleagues that fly back and forth from Regina to Calgary all the time, don’t change your methods just because I suggested it. “You do you,” as the young kids say these days. Honestly, it is safer and efficient. If it works, it works. I just hope you don’t lose your luggage.
Brian Crossman is a partner at Independent Well Servicing in Estevan. He really hopes you don’t lose your luggage, because it sucks bad. (He speaks from experience….)
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